Monthly Archives November 2017

Lose=Lose Negotiations to Start Thanksgiving . . . well almost.

It is the first year for our “combined” Thanksgiving dinner for my new marriage.  She is on the treadmill when I propose a seating arrangement for the pending dinner.  Her response was an eye roll.   “Why did we even decorate?” Uh oh. “Either way I am not going to be happy,” she says. Instead of a lose-lose negotiations, I am finally getting to where I can back off and see what she proposes.  After some laughter, conversation and me heading down to my intergalactic headquarters to write this blog, I can see the win-win can be found in not worrying
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Introvert or Extrovert. Who is more charismatic.

It is easier to associate a charismatic personality with extroverted people.  The exemplify outgoing, and “life of the party” personas.   Charisma is associated with a warm heart and so the listening skills of the introvert come in handy.   Johnny Carson learned to have a stage presence, but in real life he was a very quiet and personal man.  I believe that his ability to let others talk, to bring out the best in others, made him the star that he was. Since people “feel” charisma, that it is something that they sense, the humanoid who must be the life of
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Seriously. . . now these guys are scary. Be afraid, be very afraid. Magic fairy dust to the max.

They SERIOUSLY believe in their doctrine.  Anything else would be hypocritical.  We, as a species sniff out hypocrites.  Ultimately we shy away.   But not this bunch.  There is always a line of cars waiting at their drive up window.  Always! Chick-fil-A.   They really do believe in their doctrine.  Of course they make great food, but what is the magic fairy dust that really sinks its hooks into their customers? Hospitality. In a conversation with Andrew Allman, an owner/operator of one of their franchises, he shared that in a few days he was going to have a crew of new employees
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The Brilliance of the Multitude

There is a wisdom that comes with groups.  One person can contribute, but if you wisely draw on the insights of the group (I did say wisely) then marvelous things can occur.   Gone are the days when you needed an Einstein to win.  We will take the Aaron Rogers as our quarterback, and such talent should not be dismissed.   But on a day in and day out basis it is the support cast of characters that can you the organization brilliant. The misguided thoughts of leaders who feel like they are the keeper of all brilliant ideas must be put
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"But . . . they are free?"

Dr. Brad Harken, a dentist in Spokane, had just sat through my presentation at the American Dental Society’s National Convention. I had some free dental bib chains I wanted to give him.  They are the small chain that has clips on either end, which keep a napkin on your chest while you are having dental work done.  In this case the two chain clips said “Crest” and “Oral B”.   Stay tuned.  Even Proctor & Gamble can get it wrong. Dr. Brad noted that in his practice they don’t use the metal chains because when you put it around the patients
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Why changing clothes is so transparent to others

Change the shirt, try a different makeup ensemble, or even subject a person to plastic surgery.   Our physical appearance is a source of constant investment.  Who does it help?   Others?  Or yourself? While the outward façade may indeed fool a few people, we know that 55% of what makes us “likable” to others, is all the unspoken language. That is why authentic, sincere, honest caring is almost impossible to fake.  We feel it.  It is the “Blink” that Gladwell documents in his writing. This TLC, love, and caring is powerful.  The body responds with waves of PEA, oxytocin, and dopamine
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Dehumanizing words like Customer, Brother, Spouse . . . .

When we give someone a name, or classification like “customer”, then we group persons into a nice little folder to act upon, or to affect. When we look at a person, really look at them as someone who is having a life experience, and take into account their individual thoughts, and emotions  . . . like you might consider your own, things change. No longer can you inspire, manage, motivate, or even manipulate (heaven forbid).   The problem with Customer Service, or Sales Training, or Leadership Training is that it focuses on behaviors that will impact others. When you slow down
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